Akpors the fake Americana

After two weeks in Dubai, Akpors came back to Naija with a fake American accent. He flew in late and while on his way home was stopped by men of the Nigeria Police Force.”Hey, where u dey go? one of the officers asked Akpors. Stupid Akpors instead of replying decided to try out his new fake way of talking replied: “Wat de f*ck do u mean, Yo talking tu me?” This got the officers angry and they dragged Akpors to the station and threw him in a cell.
There in the cell, Akpors kept on ranting and shouting, “Yo bunch of shits, I gat the damn right to make a phone call in this cell. Get me a f*cking phone!!” This went on until a BOSS (Oga) in the cell told one of his boys in his husky and thunderous voice, “Scorpion, abeg give this guy one phone call”. Scorpion headed straight to Akpors’ corner and landed him a THUNDEROUS SLAP” GBOOOOAAAAAAA”. The sound was nothing far from the sound of a Thunder strike, and then he asked Akpors “bros, e done dey ring, abi make I redial?”
Akpors’ accent quickly changed and he replied: “Bros abeg, e don connect”